


i wear my heart on your sleeve

by ColorMeParanoid



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Fluff, Getting Together, Idiots in Love, M/M, Mutual Pining, Sharing Clothes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-18
Updated: 2020-10-18
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:49:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,147
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27082210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ColorMeParanoid/pseuds/ColorMeParanoid
Summary: "It says DIAZ right there on the back.""Are you sure?" Buck asks, eyes wide and projecting innocence that Eddie doesn't buy for a second."Yeah, Buck," Eddie says, crossing his arms over his chest. "I'm pretty sure I can recognize my last name when I see it."
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Evan “Buck” Buckley & Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Comments: 36
Kudos: 617





	i wear my heart on your sleeve

"Hey," Buck says as they're changing in the locker room before work, "that's my sweater."

Eddie looks down at the light blue sweater he'd put on that morning and frowns. The weather has been getting chillier as of late and he chose something warmer to wear on his way to work. The sweater was in his dresser, folded among the rest of his clothes, so he didn't think twice about putting it on. 

"No.” Eddie shakes his head. "That doesn't sound right. Why would your sweater be in my dresser?"

Buck makes a protesting noise. "You tell me. I've been looking everywhere for it. I was sure I lost it in the move somehow."

"I don't know what to tell you, Buck." Eddie takes off said sweater and carefully folds it before he puts it away in his locker. "You probably did lose it and seeing mine just reminded you of it."

Buck considers that for a moment before he gives a slow nod. "Yeah. You're probably right."

The two of them change into their work clothes and the bell rings before Eddie can give the topic any more thought. 

*

That same night, though, when he arrives home and Christopher is sound asleep, Eddie checks his laundry basket. Doing laundry was one of his most hated house chores and he was sure that he was only imagining that the loads had started multiplying over the last few months, but maybe he was right.

He rifles through the laundry basket and sure enough, he finds a pair of sweatpants that don't belong to him. In fact, he vividly remembers seeing Buck wearing them just last week during their movie night because they left very little to the imagination and it was a struggle not to keep staring at his ass.

Frowning, he walks to his dresser and opens the last drawer on the bottom only to find it filled with clothes that obviously weren't his. It had made sense to free up a drawer for Buck, considering how often he ended up spending the night over at his house and it was only logical for Buck to have a spare change of clothes for those days where he came over to Eddies straight after work.

He didn't even stop to think of this as odd as he washed and folded the extra laundry, putting it away in what he's come to think of as Buck's drawer. Eddie must have mistaken Buck's sweater for his when he washed it because it _was_ Buck's sweater, there was no doubt about it. Now that his mind was fully alert and he was actively thinking about it, he remembers seeing Buck wear it at some vague point in time because it brought out the blue of his eyes in a way Eddie couldn't help but appreciate. How that had slipped his mind, he has no idea. 

"Huh," he says in the silence of his bedroom as a wave of emotion he's been trying to suppress for so long washes over him. He thinks of the mug that Chris picked out for Buck's last birthday that has been residing in their kitchen ever since, that Buck used without fail every time he was over. He thinks of the awful fiber cereal that Buck insists is healthy that he now buys on autopilot because the sugary crap he and Chris loved made Buck feel sick when he had it so early in the morning.

Eddie’s kitchen was fully stocked with both food and cooking supplies for someone who couldn't cook to save his life and there was an entire extra full set of toiletries in his bathroom. He even bought another phone charger because Buck kept misplacing his and the spare key to Buck's apartment was attached to the same key ring where he carried the key to his own house.

All of those things could be interpreted as them being very close friends and work colleagues, Eddie tries reasoning with himself. But Hen didn't volunteer to participate in all of Chris’ shows and baking sales when Eddie was stuck at work and couldn't make it – and even when he could - and it definitely wasn't Chim's underwear that he was regularly washing along with his own. He likes Bobby just fine but his smile didn't make his stomach fill with unrelenting butterflies.

Okay, so maybe there was something more here, something deeper that neither of them was brave enough to broach yet. Sometimes, late at night when all conversation fizzled out and a comfortable silence settled around them, Eddie wanted to do something about this nearly tangible thing between them. He wanted to lean over and kiss Buck, wanted to hold his hand and tell him how much he loved him and that he wanted him to stay forever. Sometimes, Buck got this look on his face as if he was about to take the leap of faith and Eddie braced himself, only for Buck to change his mind and say nothing at all.

There is potential here, Eddie knows, that things could get so much better. But seeing as they were pretty damn great as they were, the risk of ruining their friendship instead was downright terrifying. If Buck wasn’t going to bring it up, then neither was Eddie.

He’s already ruined his marriage; the last thing he wanted was to end up losing Buck, too.

*

The very next day, things take quite an unexpected turn. Eddie is in the kitchen brewing some coffee for everyone – the one task in the kitchen he was allowed to do unsupervised – when Buck bounds up the stairs and joins him. He's unusually perky this morning, that much is obvious even through Eddie’s sleepy haze and he blames that on why it takes him an embarrassingly long time to realize something is off.

"Buck," he says after he downs what’s left of his coffee and finally sees it.

"Yeah?" Buck responds, doing a piss poor job of concealing his amusement as he goes about cracking the rest of the eggs for their breakfast. He was such a shitty actor, couldn't lie to save his own life and by god, Eddie wanted him so much.

"You're wearing my shirt," he points out casually, struggling to conceal his own amusement.

"No, I’m not," Buck says, literally biting his lip so he wouldn't give himself away. It was more adorable than it had any right to be.

Eddie gets up from his chair and takes his coffee cup to the sink to rinse it off. The sink that Buck just happens to be standing right next to, close enough to brush against as he passes him by.

"It says _DIAZ_ right there on the back."

"Are you sure?" Buck asks, eyes wide and projecting innocence that Eddie doesn't buy for a second. He had the cutest kid back home who regularly tried to use the same trick on him to get his way. He likes to think that he was pretty immune to it at this point. 

"Yeah, Buck," Eddie says, crossing his arms over his chest. "I'm pretty sure I can recognize my last name when I see it."

Eddie does have to admit that Buck wears his shirt pretty damn well. It's at least a size too small for him, of course, and the fabric inches its way up every time he moves, but seeing Buck with his last name written on his body for all to see made something primal and possessive curl in Eddie's chest. The last time he felt like this was when Shannon wore his letterman jacket back in high school. He's always been weak for this kind of thing and she never failed to exploit it. Buck has no idea what he's getting himself into here.

Or maybe he does and that’s exactly why he's doing it.

"That is odd," Buck agrees, passing the bowl of eggs to Hen who is watching them both carefully. "You don't mind if I wear it for the day, do you? I mean, you do seem to be perfectly okay with parading around in other people's clothes so this shouldn't bother you at all." 

Eddie desperately wants to argue that he hadn't done it on purpose and how it was all an accident but he bites his tongue. If Buck thought he was so easily riled up by his clever little arguments, he wasn't spending enough time around Chris when he _really_ wanted to prove his point. He decides to act entirely unaffected instead.

"I'll do you one better," he says. "You can keep it."

"Really?" Buck blinks at him, clearly surprised. What did he think Eddie was going to do? Force him to take it off right then and there in the kitchen? 

Eddie shrugs. "Why not? It's just a shirt. I've got plenty of those. Besides," he adds because he just can't help himself, can he? "It looks better on you anyway."

"Oh." Buck is no stranger to compliments, but one from Eddie and he's blushing like there's no tomorrow. Eddie suddenly regrets not handing them out more often if they always warranted such a lovely reaction.

Then, reality crashes in and Eddie feels his walls go up, sees Buck regain his composure and he's about to make a joke and play it off when Chimney, who he'd forgotten was even there in the first place, groans and says, "For fucks sake, just kiss already."

"Chim!" Hen hisses at him. "We said we wouldn't get involved."

"And what? Let these two knuckleheads pine after one another for a few more years before they marry other people and then one of them nearly dies – _again_ \- forcing them to have a long awaited death bed love confession that ruins both their new families and friendship for good? Because that's the direction they're heading in right now!"

Chim's words are followed by a stunned silence.

"You've been watching too many telenovelas," Hen finally says, with no little amount of concern.

"Han-Buckley Junior refuses to sleep through the night and they're the only mildly entertaining thing that runs all night, okay?" He turns to Buck and Eddie who are still gaping at him in shock. "But that doesn't mean I'm wrong." He makes an _I’m watching you gesture_ before Hen shakes her head and leads him down and towards the bunk room to put him down for a much needed nap.

"Wow," Buck says.

Eddie nods. "Yeah, babies can do that to you. They're like the cutest little energy sucking vampires." Buck still looks worried, so he adds, "He'll be fine once he gets used to it. Maybe we could offer to babysit for a few hours when our schedules sync up? Give him and Maddie a chance to get some actual rest?"

He catches himself right after he says it. When had _I_ turned into a _we_ and why did it feel so right and easy to say? Buck doesn't notice it either at first as he immediately agrees, probably already going through all of their schedules, determined to make it happen under whatever means necessary.

Eddie can see the moment when Buck realizes what he'd said, the way his eyes widen and his cheeks start turning read, because Chimney wasn't exactly wrong, was he? They could still laugh it off like they always do, but this time, Eddie doesn't want to.

If they did share feelings, if they wanted the same thing, what was the point of denying it? The only thing that would get them was more suffering down the line because Eddie had felt this way for years and the feelings had only grown instead of went away. There was no getting over Evan Buckley. 

And if the feelings aren’t reciprocated, better he knows it now than years down the line when Buck finds someone to create his own family with. If there was no future for a potential relationship, they had to draw some boundaries and learn how to move on as only friends.

God, Eddie hopes there's a future for them. The thought of having to clear out Buck's drawer makes him want to cry.

“Chim’s right, though,” Eddie says, heart beating so hard he's afraid it might actually burst out of his chest. “We should… talk.” He clears his throat. “About us.”

Buck looks at him for one long moment and Eddie is sure that this is it. This will be the end of them. Buck doesn’t feel the same, he’s just been having fun and flirting for the sake of it – but then he steps closer and cups Eddies face between his warm palms and says, “How about I do you one better?”

Eddie is smiling before their lips meet for the very first time.

It turns out that sometimes, taking a leap of faith was more than worth the risk. 


End file.
